Abstinence at the movies
Posted by Mathew | February 7, 2010 | Comments
The recent media attention on the issue of sexual abstinence of the past two to three weeks – which I wrote a commentary piece on over at The Aristophrenium – led me to watch a movie that I would not have ordinarily have watched. Not 15 minutes into the film I was beginning to regret watching it – I wasn’t expecting it to be as crude and as base at it actually was. In hindsight, knowing our culture and the way in which it views sexual topics and issues, perhaps I shouldn’t have been so surprised. In any case, I got the kids off to bed and settled down with my wife to watch The 40 Year Old Virgin.
I’ve come to enjoy Steve Carell’s performances – albeit, my exposure to him has been a little limited: I’ve never watched The Office and there’s only three other movies that I can name him in (actually, four, now I think about it). Seemingly an understudy for Jim Carey (who’s acting I never cared much for, but Ace Ventura is a worthy mention), I was much endeared by Steve Carell’s role in Dan In Real Life, whimsically amused at his Moses character in Evan Almighty and impressed with his straight-faced portrayal of Maxwell Smart in Get Smart. Watching him in The 40 Year Old Virgin was therefore somewhat of a shock – especially in the hair-removal scene (at which any hairy-chested man would wince at) where his language was a flurry of unending obscenities – but it was clear that his character was, overall, a pleasant stark contrast to those others in the film.
To sum up the plot of the movie is pretty simple – most anyone could deduce the entire story line from the film’s title alone: a single guy, never married, has never had sex; his colleagues (who are three ravenous womanisers of a high order) make it a pact to get him “laid”. And the awkwardness of the lead character while subject to this pact becomes the focal point of the first half of the movie.
For me, The 40 Year Old Virgin – if you can stomach the crass sexualised language – did for sexual abstinence much like what the film Juno did for the pro-life cause – surprisingly, it praised it. Or at least, it gave the audience due pause to consider it as a viable notion. For this reason, while the film starts out poorly it finishes as it should with Steve’s character, Andy, losing (or should we say, “giving away”) his virginity on his wedding night.
With that spoiler out of the way (I’m assuming that since the film is five years old now, you may have already seen it), it was only half way through the movie that my wife made a startling observation: Andy’s work colleagues – whom, we learn, have been, currently are, or intend to be, promiscuous in their sexual dealings – are jealous of Andy’s (seemingly accidental) virtue.
It’s this strange contrast between Andy and his colleagues that plays out for the remainder of the movie. He ignorantly, yet with hesitation, goes along with the “advice” his colleagues give him on what he needs to do to “cure” his virginity. Yet all along it becomes very clear to the audience that Andy is the most content with who he is – he finds the sexualised lifestyle of his friends somewhat uncomfortable and undesirable; for him, sex is about something much much more than what his friends make it out to be. As the movie progresses, we find his friends are increasingly unhappy with their choices – and it’s there that it becomes clear they are envious of Andy. In retaining his virginity, he has not become subject to the vices of pursuing sex with a reckless abandon as they had – failed relationships, relationships of dependancy, regret, dissatisfaction and discontentment with current relationships and an unfulfilling yet insatiable quest of sexual philandering.
No, Andy’s character brings to the screen something we rarely see in movies: being a virgin is ok and remaining abstinent is achievable and can heighten and intensify the courting process – solidifying the relationship – when both partners are willing participants.
As I wrote in my “Abstinence arouses displeasure” article, Bristol Palin I think understands the value in abstinence and Tony Abbott realises the long term value it can bring to the marriage bond.
Whether this was the intended emphasis of the movie, I am not sure; but it does, much like I implied with Juno, open the way for parents of mature teens who watch the movie to discuss the topic with them and to point out to them that sex, in it’s proper context, is something worth waiting for.
And that’s something of which any Biblical Christian would agree is worth discussing.
If you haven’t seen the movie and are now curious, please do be aware that the language and sexual themes are really strong and very frequent throughout.
Tags: abstinence > culture > love > sexuality > Steve Carell
Excerpt: Abstinence arouses displeasure Down-under and State-side
Posted by Mathew | February 2, 2010 | Comments
[The following is an excerpt of an article I published on The Aristophrenium. As indicated in my two-year anniversary post, I will be writing both here at thoughts out !oud and The Aristophrenium.]
“One thing that hasn’t been abstaining from the news in the past fortnight is culture’s attitude towards sex. There are two counts in particular that caught my interest: one was State-side, aroused by curious questions from Oprah Winfrey on her namesake’s show; the other was a reactive orgasm from Australia’s media and some members of it’s Federal Government (including the Deputy Prime Minister, no less) towards remarks made by the Opposition Leader.
Both instances concerned the topic of sexual abstinence and, while both were… Continue reading ...
Tags: abstinence > Bristol Palin > Julia Gillard > Oprah > sexuality > The Aristophrenium > Tony Abbott
Woman arrested for attempted murder for failed abortion
Posted by Mathew | February 1, 2010 | Comments
Here’s some more No Shortage of Crazy:
Q. If a woman desires (and is permitted by law) to terminate her pregnancy, under what circumstances is she not allowed to?
A. In a culture which says that abortions are permitted by law when the mother does not desire the child, doesn’t it then seem contradictory to state that the mother cannot induce a termination of her own accord?
In most States in the US and increasingly in the UK and in Australia, abortions can be solicited for any reason, even if the pregnancy is desired by the father – the mother’s decision vetoes that of her husband’s/partner’s.
Recently, an Iowanian woman was arrested for attempt of murder… Continue reading ...
Quote: When sex gets the best of you
Posted by Mathew | January 31, 2010 | Comments
“What had happened to the human imagination, as a whole, was that the whole world was coloured by dangerous and rapidly deteriorating passions; by natural passions becoming unnatural passions. Thus the effect of treating sex as only one innocent natural thing was that every other innocent natural thing became soaked and sodden with sex. For sex cannot be admitted to a mere equality among elementary emotions or experiences like eating and sleeping. The moment sex ceases to be a servant it becomes a tyrant. There is something dangerous and disproportionate in its place in human nature, for whatever reason; and it does really need a special purification and dedication. The modern talk about sex being free like any other sense… Continue reading ...
Useful tweets for everyday Christians – 2010-01-22
Posted by Mathew | January 21, 2010 | Comments
- #Muslim martyrs compared to #Christian martyrs – is there a difference? You bet: http://is.gd/6IrUX #religion #
- #Jesus is not the bridge over troubled waters. But if you allow him he will pull you through the waters if you can stand the tow. #
- #Religion is not the opiate of the masses … TV is the opiate of the masses. Frankly, they're better off with religion. #
- There's more to The Aristophrenium than you think. All will be revealed on 1 Feb 2010. Follow @Aristophrenium to find out. #
- Great msg from #JohnPiper on How to deal w the Guilt of past #Sexual
Celebrating two years online … now there’s a thought
Posted by Mathew | January 21, 2010 | Comments
Today marks the 2nd year anniversary of thoughts out !oud.
It really doesn’t seem all that long ago when I first figured out how to install Wordpress, chose an appalling Wordpress theme (I dunno what it was … some garishly bright yellow and orange sun-thing), cobbled together my first post and delved right on into the blogosphere. The two years have gone quick, have been an interesting journey – full of lessons and growth – and during the time there are many people I’ve come to know and to whom I’ve been grateful for along the way.
Following are just some of the highlights, reflections and learnings for me over the last two years.
Small beginnings
How to spark revival in your church
Posted by Mathew | January 17, 2010 | Comments
If your church is wanning in the Spirit and is in need of a rejuvenation, all your congregation may need is the blessing of a squirrel-lead revival.
Praise God!
(Enjoy.)
[youtube]K16fG1sDagU[/youtube]
(H/Tip to Dennis G Hurst, via Facebook.)… Continue reading ...
Tags: Christianity > church > Ray Stevens > Religion > revival > self-righteousness
Useful tweets for everyday Christians – 2010-01-15
Posted by Mathew | January 14, 2010 | Comments
- #Quebec vows to stamp out #heterosexism to eradicate #homophobia. That's just queer in itself: http://is.gd/6eGx1 #tcot #
- @bretta75 & @tlenayebi – thank you for the RTs! #
- The greatness of a society is measured best by how it cares & protects those citizens who r least able to care for themselves. #
- All #Christians ought read & affirm the #ManhattanDeclaration. Help them reach a million signatories: http://is.gd/6dO6z #fb #
- Victoria, #Australia permits #lesbian duo to be named as parents on birth certificate of #IVF child: http://bit.ly/4vNVNH #family #
- A refreshing
Subscribe to my thoughts!
